...I really shouldnt complain, but sometimes i do not understand anything, gone are the joyous days of being a teenager and knowing it all, now even though i understand alot its people that leave me wondering, which makes alot of sense when you look at my career choice. As a psychologist i am super lucky to get to see people thinking and hear their motivations...{or at least what they think is their motivation) ever single day and from that i have learnt sooooooo much, but still people puzzle frustrate and delight me...well my clients are delightful, they are the best, its my friends, acquaintances and colleagues that keep me guessing, that dissapoint and confuse me. I spend most days swinging wildly between loving people the most and hating them..ok hate is maybe a little strong but you know what i mean.
Why do good people do stupid stupid hurtful things then try and justify it to themselves and me with dumb lies!!!! I am not stupid as i said i do know a little about motivation for behaviour so why do they lie to me?????....I know people make mistakes, yea gods i've made more than most (and loved every single one of them with enough time after the fact heehee) but really and seriously do they think that this is the right thing to do????? I dont care what anyone does as long as they are honest with themselves (and me) about what they have done....I really dont care enough about what they do for them to feel the need to be dishonest....I can deal with anyone doing anyhting..shit i'll even help them with the justification as long as they dont lie to me....the funny/ironic part of this behaviour is that if you are honest, i will always love you, but lie in the hope that i wont find out and wont be dissapointed in you and bang...you've lost my respect and unless i find another use for you then you will probably loose my friendship too!!!!! That sounds super harsh, but in my world,(at this point in time) thats the way it is.......
